Girls, Stop Doing This

Written By: Kim - Jul• 14•13

Yesterday our family was at a summer swim meet for our children. All of the teams require the parents to volunteer because the meet literally cannot happen without them. I was in the last timer’s slot which started at 11 am.

As the last age group walked on deck (ages 15-18) for relays, I heard one of the teen girls say to the other: “Last race of the day…if I can get my big self into the pool.” I almost had whip lash turning to look at this girl. My suspicions were confirmed: This athlete was in fine shape.

red buttonI have seen roughly 2,000+ kids competitively swim since my children joined the summer league in 2012. This includes the high school swim team that my son is a part of. I only have seen a handful of overweight athletes; not the ones who just think they are. But, even these athletes can still swim faster than the average adult. Ask any adult if they can swim 50 meters in any stroke in less than one minute. They will laugh. The majority of the athletes I see (and yes, this includes dancers, gymnasts, etc.) are in great shape and aerobically conditioned.

Girls, stop sabotaging your self-esteem by using words that are negative when you discuss or think about yourself. I am serious. Fill your mind with positive thoughts. Do not buy in to the Madison Avenue air brushed, Photoshopped version of who you think you are supposed to be. A quick Google search will yield plenty of eye-opening images: real images of supposedly perfect-looking women without makeup, Photoshop or a hair stylist.

Stop comparing your body to that of your friends. Everyone is built slightly differently. Apple, pear, athletic, curvaceous, it does not matter. Stop worrying about a thigh gap. They are not natural. What matters is you and the contributions you make to your family, friends, local community and one day, the world. What matters is your heart and mind.

And while you are at it, tell your Mom to stop calling herself fat. Show her the same images. Tell her that it impacts you in a negative way. Respect yourself or no one else will.

Is This All There Is?

Written By: Kim - Oct• 18•11

Three days a week, I take the commuter train of the living dead. Let’s just say we are pulling away from home before 6 am. And, yes, there is one more train before ours that leaves my hometown a little after 5 am, but I rarely make that train. The last stop puts us at Washington, DC’s Union Station at 6:57 am. Most of us spend the last few minutes pulling in to the station gearing up for our day ahead. Or at least hoping the caffeine will kick in soon.

Today, one of my train buddies, who has a great personality and sense of humor was shaking his head and yawning. I asked him what was up. He pondered: “Some days, I wonder. Is this all there is?” I chuckled and told him that he was having a mini mid-life crisis. And, that most of us do not work because we want to, we work because we have to in order to enjoy things such as a home, vacations, college tuition, etc. As we went our separate ways, I thought about what he said.

Praiano, Almalfi Coast, Italy rainbow ©God. Photo ©Mike Howard.

We toil. We live. We survive. We love. We work. We learn. So what? Why are we doing this again? What drives us to enjoy life? I am not talking about simply going through the motions, but really living. Enjoying our family and friends; liking our career choices; finding our talent and passion outside of work. Making a difference somewhere to someone.

I don’t have the answer. I can just tell you to do something that makes you happy. If you hate your job and can’t leave, find an interest outside work. Discover one of your 10 talents. I have it on good authority from my Mom, who knew everything, that God gives us all 10 talents. It’s up to us to find them all. Volunteer — an organization somewhere needs someone just like you. Try a hobby. Hit the gym. Spend time with your friends. Start a book club, a poker night, bunco group or knitting club.

Do something to make yourself happy and discover there is more to life than we realize. Seize your day.