A Birthday Ode to Mom

Written By: Kim - Aug• 27•14

Yesterday would have been my mom’s 88th birthday. Sadly, she passed away in 2002 at 76 from heart disease. She is one of the reasons I am on a quest for optimal health.

What you do not know about her is that she was the first born child of Italian immigrants long before Jersey Shore gave us caricatures. Her parents owned a grocery store in Long Beach. Her father could not get over the fact that his first born was not a son and mistreated her until the day my grandmother divorced him.

2014-08-27 07.02.56My Catholic mother was married twice, survived the Great Depression, WW II, Korea, Vietnam, being a military wife and five children. Despite the weird policies about divorced Catholics prior to Vatican II, she never lost her faith in God.

She welcomed all of my friends into our home, but if she did not like you, she had a reason. The reason was not always apparent to me. But, she would always let me know. And damn, she was always spot on. She could read people easily and she passed that along to me. Luckily, she loved my husband.

Our home was open to everyone, and I mean everyone before it was en vogue to be ok with your gay friends. One of her dearest friends and side business partner was gay. If you know anything about small towns and the south, you know that she was a rebel. She was a social butterfly who would have loved FB. She was a good cook and an even better baker.

I was the first of five kids to graduate from college. Neither one of my parents had a college degree. I believe that she was most proud of me on that day and six years later when I received my masters.

She lived long enough to see me be pregnant and birth two children, but sadly did not live long enough to get to really know them. She instilled in me many things but the greatest was my faith in God, love of family and the secret to making a great, moist cake. I feel some sense if relief that she is buried in Arlington.

Mothers are not perfect and I could list all of the things about her that drove me insane. Call your mom and tell her that you love her. Today

Social Media Makes Strange Friendfellows

Written By: Kim - May• 01•13

About four months ago, I received a call from a woman that I did not know while I was making dinner. She was looking for someone with the same name who lived in my area. I kept sifting my memory as she was telling me her story, catching up. I wondered if early senility was setting in. I could not remember who this woman was. Donna. School, past jobs, where did I know her from? When she said something about working for a four star general at the Pentagon, that’s when I knew I did not know her. I’ve never worked for either.

© Mihaylova 2013 courtesy of stock.xchng

© Mihaylova 2013 courtesy of stock.xchng

When I politely stopped her with, “I think you have the wrong person,” she was completely flustered. She apologized profusely. I told her that I wish I were the woman she was looking for because she was trying to make amends and repair a broken relationship. I was touched by her honestly and her story. I wished her luck and we hung up. A few minutes later, Donna called me again. She asked if we could become friends on Facebook. I said yes.

I have a few friends whom I only know through social media or whom I became friends with on social media first. I know that it seems odd, cultivating a friendship with someone you have never met. But, we did as children. Remember pen pals?

Growing up a military brat forced me to make new friends every school year. This didn’t necessarily mean that I was the new one in school. But it meant that I had to be more open to strangers. I had to find a way to fit in when I was the new kid. Or, I felt compelled to help the new kid fit in. Being the new kid in school often sucks. It just does and there’s no way to get around it but to go thru it.

That said, I don’t accept friend requests from just anyone. But, I have found great joy in all my friends, no matter the source.