A Birthday Ode to Mom

Written By: Kim - Aug• 27•14

Yesterday would have been my mom’s 88th birthday. Sadly, she passed away in 2002 at 76 from heart disease. She is one of the reasons I am on a quest for optimal health.

What you do not know about her is that she was the first born child of Italian immigrants long before Jersey Shore gave us caricatures. Her parents owned a grocery store in Long Beach. Her father could not get over the fact that his first born was not a son and mistreated her until the day my grandmother divorced him.

2014-08-27 07.02.56My Catholic mother was married twice, survived the Great Depression, WW II, Korea, Vietnam, being a military wife and five children. Despite the weird policies about divorced Catholics prior to Vatican II, she never lost her faith in God.

She welcomed all of my friends into our home, but if she did not like you, she had a reason. The reason was not always apparent to me. But, she would always let me know. And damn, she was always spot on. She could read people easily and she passed that along to me. Luckily, she loved my husband.

Our home was open to everyone, and I mean everyone before it was en vogue to be ok with your gay friends. One of her dearest friends and side business partner was gay. If you know anything about small towns and the south, you know that she was a rebel. She was a social butterfly who would have loved FB. She was a good cook and an even better baker.

I was the first of five kids to graduate from college. Neither one of my parents had a college degree. I believe that she was most proud of me on that day and six years later when I received my masters.

She lived long enough to see me be pregnant and birth two children, but sadly did not live long enough to get to really know them. She instilled in me many things but the greatest was my faith in God, love of family and the secret to making a great, moist cake. I feel some sense if relief that she is buried in Arlington.

Mothers are not perfect and I could list all of the things about her that drove me insane. Call your mom and tell her that you love her. Today

The Limited Coat that Offers Decades of Warmth

Written By: Kim - Jan• 08•14
The 1989 coat from The Limited. Still in excellent condition.

The 1989 coat from The Limited. Still in excellent condition.

When I moved to Washington, DC, in 1989, from Alabama, I begged my frugal, depression-era mother to purchase this amazing, modern, dark navy blue wool coat that hits about mid-calf. I was starting a journalism internship at the National Journalism Center and would be in the metro area until mid-December.

The coat was from The Limited and they had layaway, if I recall correctly. It was hot as hell that summer, like it normally is in southern Alabama, and putting a coat on layaway, especially one this intense, seemed silly. But I knew I would need it for the fall internship in DC. I had a thinner car coat, which was normally sufficient in an Alabama winter where we might end up wearing shorts on Christmas Day. In 1989 in Washington, DC., it snowed that Thanksgiving. I remember because my sister, who lived in Maryland, picked me up that Wednesday and we drove to her home as the snow accumulated.

We were a single paycheck family, I was the last of five and $200 was a lot of money. My father, as you may recall, served in the US Army as an enlisted GI. My mother was a homemaker and grew up in The Great Depression. In our home, there was a difference between necessity and luxury; between desire and need. After much negotiation on my part, she finally agreed.

Twenty-five years later, through weight gain and losses, pregnancies, five homes and three dogs, I still have this coat. I asked a tailor to replace the lining and added white alpaca fur around the collar and sleeves a few years ago just to give it a different look. The coat is in excellent shape and my parents definitely got their $200 out of it. In fact, it cost my parents roughly $8 annually for me to wear this coat since then.

On days when we experience frigid weather, especially as we have this week in the DC area, I am extremely grateful that I still have this coat. Maybe that’s why I still hang it in my closet. Aside from the fact that it’s still useful, my parents made a sacrifice for me, as they did often.

Paired with a pair of knee-high leather boots and the memory of my my mother’s love, it’s all I need to stay warm.